Jenks Hypnosis and Training Center, LLC
805 N. Fir, Jenks, OK 74037 (918)
Located in Jenks, America, near the heart of south Tulsa
The Power of Our Thoughts
Ever dwelled on what you don't want only to have that very thing happen? Ever thought much about how you think affects what you do? Ever eavesdropped on your thoughts?
We are all overwhelmed with negativity every day. It comes from our boss, our spouse, our kids, our friends, our co-workers, even strangers. Some of it isn't even aimed at us specifically, but, because we seem to be gluttons for punishment, we take it as our own. However, the majority of the negative thoughts and comments we deal with start between our own ears! Humans have somewhere in the neighborhood of 75,000 thoughts each day. Some 50,000 of them are negative. Think about what you say to yourself over and over and over that is constantly reinforcing the negative tapes you got as a child.
The subconscious mind, particularly a child's subconscious mind, is like a sponge. It absorbs everything it hears and doesn't bother to evaluate 'good' or 'bad'. It is a literal creature and everything goes in as gospel truth. That's why wee ones believe in fairies and giants and flying dragons. It is in childhood that we learn we are bright - or dumber than a fence post. We are beautiful - or ugly enough to shake a stick at. How did we get all this negative training? From our parents and other adults. I am absolutely not bashing parents. I'm rather fond of them, being as I'm one myself.
Remember this quote: "I know you think you understand what you thought I said but what you heard is not what I meant." This is the subconscious in a nut shell. Remember all those sayings our parents used to teach us manners? "Don't speak unless you are spoken to." "Don't stand in the limelight." "Don't be rude." All good statements but what the subconscious heard was something completely different! Don't speak unless you are spoken to is translated to "You don't have anything worth while saying." (Bummer!) Don't stand the limelight becomes "That belongs to someone who is truly worthy." (Ergo -I am not.) And don't be rude is recorded as "It's wrong to speak your mind and people won't like you."
Wacky? You bet. Is that what they intended? Of course not! But it is the problem so many of us deal with and it is the basis of our negative self talk. Our internal self (the subconscious) and our external self (our cognitive processes) are in conflict and the battle rages on. We focus on the past, on all of the mistakes we've made and the black cloud above us just keeps getting darker and darker. We begin to believe that our negatives are our defining points and we completely disregard all of the positive things we are and have done. We are stuck in a negative loop that keeps cycling round and round.
So - what is the answer? Start by taking a good long look at yourself - and your life. Ask yourself a few questions.
1. Can I accept myself as I am? (No?) Why not? Who says you have to be different?
2. Can I accept credit for what I do? (No?) Why not? Who says you don't deserve it?
3. Can I accept a compliment? (No?) Why not? Who says it isn't OK to feel good about yourself?
If the answer to these three questions is 'me', think really carefully before you answer this next one.
4. Whose expectations am I really living up to? (Be honest.) Yours or someone else's?
Ok. I know I've wandered a wee bit, but the point is we are taught - trained - to put ourselves down, beat ourselves up and negate ourselves. We have taken the lessons to heart and we're doing an excellent job of all three! Did you know that negative words are six times more powerful than positive ones? Think about what you are saying to yourself!
You are the only one who has the right, the ability, the power to control your thoughts. You are the only one who has the power to change them. It takes practice, intent and perseverance. You didn't get here over night and you won't get unstuck over night. But you can do it! Start with an image of yourself as you want to be. Make it real. What are you wearing? What are you doing? What are you saying and how are you saying it? If you are a visual person, draw a picture, or write it out in detail. If you are an auditory person, read it to your self - out loud. Develop a statement that embodies all you want to achieve. Perhaps some of these will resonate with you.
1. I have the ability, the confidence and the power to create the life I want.
2. I give myself permission to be happy.
3. I deserve All good things.
4. I am worthy to achieve my goals.
And the two best ones:
5. I am in control of Everything I do.
6. I am limited only by my own thoughts.
Chose one, repeat it to yourself over and over every day as you go through your morning routine. Put reminders all over the house, your workspace. Make it the scrolling marquee on your computer. (If you don't know how to do that, call me. I can walk you through it.) Then as you go through your bedtime routine and drift off to sleep, keep repeating it to yourself. Each time you do, say it like you mean it! Change your posture. Stand up straight and hold your head high. Stop Slumping! Change the way you walk. Lift your head, keep those eyes up and moving. Throw those shoulders back and walk like you deserve to be here. (Even if you haven't quite convinced yourself of that fact yet. As my husband would say, "Fake it 'til you make it." ) Remember, your thoughts, your words have power. You and only you have the power, the control - the right - to choose if they will be positive or negative.
Allow me to regress a moment to number two. I give myself permission to be happy. Think about the power of that statement. So many times we don't do something simply because no one said we could. No one gave us permission including ourselves! To give yourself permission is the most empowering statement you can make to yourself. Take it to heart. Use it frequently. Empower yourself. Give yourself permission to just BE!
Now, back to the positive statements. Until you get into the habit of affirming yourself, you may slip now and again. So - when you realize you've made a negative statement (or someone has made one for you) turn it into a positive statement and say it at least six times. Ever said, "I can't believe I did something so stupid."? Turn it around. "I am an intelligent person who sometimes makes errors." Believe in yourself. Praise yourself. Forgive yourself. If you don't praise believe in, and forgive yourself, who will? If you think you don't deserve it, why would anyone else! And if you need help letting go of all the old, negative tapes and installing these new, positive ones; call us at the Jenks Hypnosis Center. We can help you find the path to positive thinking.